by Aleta Kay
You have anger issues. You feel worthless. You feel like the most unlovable person in the world. Maybe your problem is pride. Maybe you think you’re so good you don’t need God. Or maybe you’ve been so abused you always end up in unhealthy relationships. You tell yourself you can’t help it. This is just the way you are.
Let me share something of my history with you so will know that I do understand emotional pain. My grandfather, from what my mother used to tell me, was a mean man. My mother had a horrible temper and would sometimes go on a three-day rampage. My mother didn’t know anything about discipline. She used punishment. Discipline trains a child by explaining why a spanking is coming or why a privilege is being taken away. Punishment is the result of out-of-control anger. Mom’s having a bad day and you get the backlash. Most of the spankings I got were deserved, but most of them were also done in anger and were more harsh than necessary. My mother rarely told me she loved me and at the age of nine I was convinced my mother hated me. I told myself that the times she was nice were out of guilt. I know now that none of that is true and I’m thankful I was able to have a good relationship with her before she died.
We give ourselves messages about ourselves and our value or worth based on our circumstances and those messages. We are what we believe because we don’t know any better. All of that negativity becomes kind of like a security blanket. It’s our comfort zone and we are terrified of change so we say, “Well, that’s just the way I am. I can’t help it.”
You are right. On your own, you can’t help it. But I have WONDERFUL news! Change is possible because God is all powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere present. You didn’t want to be the kind of parent you were raised with but you have so much rage inside. Maybe you use drugs or alcohol to escape the pain and you end up neglecting your child(ren). You don’t mean to but you can’t help it. You just don’t know what to do or who to turn to.
Look around you. The happiest people I know are people who live for the Lord and the opportunity to serve Him.
The Bible tells us that we are all sinners, and although we learn many of our behaviors and attitudes from our parents and others, the truth is we choose our actions, attitudes, beliefs and messages we give ourselves. The consequences are ours because the choices are ours. We are the way we are because we are sinners. Every single person alive, regardless of age, race, religion, job status or political status, is a sinner. There is not one person who has ever deserved to go to heaven or ever will deserve it.
We cannot earn our way into God’s grace. “For by the works of the flesh shall no man be saved.” “For we are saved by grace, and not by the works of the flesh, lest any man should boast.” These are verses out of the Bible, God’s holy word. If anyone could be good enough on their own then Jesus died a cruel death on the cross for nothing. Because Jesus is God (see John 1:1-14) and never had any sin, He is the only way we can get to heaven. Not because we are good enough, but because we BELIEVE on His name and His sacrifice. He shed His blood for our sins. He took our penalty.
Some people say that’s too easy. There must be more to it than that. People say that because they want to earn it. We feel guilty if we accept a gift without giving anything in return. But we do. We give ourselves, and that is all God wants.
GOD LOVES YOU!!! HE WANTS TO SAVE YOU FROM YOUR SIN, FROM YOURSELF. HE WANTS TO LOVINGLY TAKE YOU OUT OF SATAN’S GRASP AND PLACE YOU IN HIS LOVING HANDS WHERE YOU WILL BE SEALED UNTO THE DAY OF REDEMPTION. THAT’S THE DAY JESUS WILL COME BACK TO TAKE US, HIS CHILDREN, THOSE THAT BELIEVE ON HIS NAME, OUT OF THIS WORLD. The Bible tells us we must believe that Jesus is God the Son, that He died on the cross for our sins, and that He arose again, out of the grave. We must tell God we are sorry for our sins (and mean it). We must be willing to turn away from our sins and let God help us become the people He wants us to be.
He can help you. He wants to help you. The change isn’t easy. You will not instantly become perfect and have no more struggles. But you will have God’s Holy Spirit living inside you to help you. Find a good church that uses the King James Bible, (the only one that hasn’t been manipulated by man to please ourselves) and get involved in Sunday school where you will learn how to study your Bible and grow in the Lord. You will meet other people who have been where you are now. They won’t be perfect and you may get your feelings hurt sometimes but just remember they aren’t perfect either, and they also have to grow in the Lord (no matter how long they’ve been a Christian).
Finally, if you’re one of those people who says you don’t want to be saved if it’s open to pedophiles, prostitutes, murderers, drunks, and drug-pushers, you do have a choice. You can either go to hell with the ones who don’t get saved, or you can get saved and go to heaven with the ones that do get saved. After all, you’re not perfect either and God loves you.