Wednesday, March 28, 2012

What Has God Ever Done For Me?

by Aleta Kay

          I often hear this question from people who have suffered a tragic loss: the death of a child or spouse; a lingering, debilitating illness; or the loss of home due to weather or loss of job.    
          I understand the grief (I have suffered the loss of both of my parents and younger brother), but it is important to recognize that all people suffer and have problems. Your neighbor may seem to be living in full ease and enjoyment of life but that doesn’t mean he has never had a problem.
          The Bible tells us that it is appointed unto a man once to die. Everyone at some point in their lives will lose a loved one, and it will not always be an older person. Since none of us knows how many days are allotted to us, it is imperative that we make our preparations to meet our maker. And if we are prepared to meet Him, we will be in a better place anyway. This world is not getting better; it is getting worse by the day as we see more and more children committing heinous crimes. Lawlessness is increasing. Our government is slowly legislating away our rights. The world in general is seeing more and more natural disasters, more devastation.
          The Bible, God’s holy Word, teaches us that all of these things will come to pass. Everything it has predicted would happen until now has happened, and more prophecy is being fulfilled, it seems, almost on a monthly basis.
          If God is so good why does He let these things happen? First of all because He knows man is stubborn and will only turn to God when man thinks he needs God. When things are good we ignore Him. God wants our fellowship. After all, He created us. Secondly, He wants us to know we need Him. He wants us to ask Him for help. He delights in doing things for us and in helping us through our struggles. He is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Though family and friends turn their backs on us, God never does. Finally, He allows us to go through these things to make us stronger so we can help others who are struggling. We are here to help and encourage each other. We are here to warn people of darker days coming and assure them that, if they put their faith and trust in Christ Jesus, the life after this one is far better than anything we can imagine. This life is temporary. This body is temporary. The bodies we get after this life will either be fit for hell and eternal torment, or fit for heaven where there is no more pain or heartache.
          Why would you, or anyone, feel that you should be exempt from suffering and death? Why should you be different from everyone else? What has God done for you? He loved you so much that He sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to take your punishment for sin upon Himself, suffer more than any human being has ever done, and die on a cruel cross. But the story doesn’t end there. He rose again that He might conquer death, hell and the grave. Because He lives we also can live eternally with Him, or without Him. He even loved us enough to let us choose. God doesn’t send people to hell. He simply speaks the sentence that we have passed upon ourselves. Heaven is available to all who will be believe.
          If you have suffered a loss, turn to God. Give Him your heartache. He wants to comfort you and strengthen you. He wants to help you through this. The Bible says God stores our tears in a bottle. Just as Jesus wept over the city of Jerusalem; just as He wept over the tomb of Lazarus because of the grief of his sisters, Mary and Martha, so He weeps with you. Give Him a chance. It will take time, but joy will come again. Just get through this day. Tomorrow will take care of itself.


Tuesday, March 27, 2012

False Conversion

by Aleta Kay

         
          There are so many religions, so many denominations. There is so much false teaching out there. How is anyone supposed to know the truth?
          Religion is a bunch of man-made rules and rituals that supposedly will help you earn your way into heaven or God’s good grace. Religion will send you to hell. It is man’s attempt to be good enough for God. The Bible tells us we can never  be good enough. That’s why Jesus had to die on the cross.
          Denominations are created by man to satisfy his own needs in finding his relationship with God. There is nothing wrong with a finding a church that you are comfortable in as far as their style of worship. It is only a problem if: 1)They use a translation of the Bible that leaves out verses, chapters, and changes the wording to suit man’s conscience, and 2) if they use that form of worship to stir up your emotions, put you on a spiritual high, and don’t teach you anything about what God expects from His children.
          Some churches teach that all you have to do is say a prayer and you’re in. You’re done. You’ve got your ticket to heaven and you can do anything you want. Nonsense! The Bible doesn’t teach that. There are many places where we are told to get rid of certain things and characteristics in our lives. We are responsible and accountable to our Heavenly Father.
          Some churches teach that you must speak in tongues or you must be baptized in order to be “saved.” The Bible teaches that we must simply believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and His sacrificial death on the cross to atone for our sins. Anything more than that is a works based salvation and will get us nothing. You can be baptized into every church in the world and still go to hell. You can join all the churches you want and still end up in the place of torment made for Satan and his angels.
          Yes, we should be baptized after we are saved. It is an outward sign to others that we have repented of our sins (turned away from them) and asked the Lord Jesus to be our Savior. It is an outward expression of our faith. Some people are too ill to be baptized. Some are saved on their death beds, just barely making it into heaven.
          The most important point is, if you want a richer, fuller, happier life, give your life to Jesus. Lay it at His feet as your offering to Him. Let Him do what He will with it. Yes, there will still be problems, and you may lose some friends, maybe even family, but Jesus will never leave you or forsake you. He will be with you through every struggle and trial in the person of the Holy Spirit who takes up residence in your heart when you truly repent and give Him your life.
          Make a life-changing decision that will really make your life worthwhile. You won’t be sorry.


Monday, March 26, 2012

Ambition: The Drive To Succeed

by Aleta Kay

         Do you have the drive to succeed? Are there things you want to accomplish but can’t seem to find the energy or creative flow to get it done? Do you have all sorts of creative ideas running around in your head but you’re too tired to act on them? Ecclesiastes 9:10 says, “Whatever thy hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom in the grave where you are going.” In other words, work your hardest while you are alive and healthy enough to do so. You don’t get another chance after you die.
          Is your drive to succeed causing problems in your relationships? There is help. Ephesians 4:1b-3 has the answer: “…walk worthy of the vocation (gift, talent, career) wherewith you are called, with all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering (patience), forbearing one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” Talk things out. Listen to each other’s point of view. Be sure to spend time together: don’t let your vocation and desire for success tear your family apart. Let them be part of the process, if they are willing. If not, then be sure to keep time available for them. Losing them is not worth consideration.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Do You Need An Attitude Adjustment

by Aleta Kay

         We’re human. We get angry. We get upset. We get discouraged, depressed, disgusted, and sometimes downright ugly in our attitudes. It starts in our minds, in the way we think. We allow ourselves to get upset, most of the time over little things.
         I teach young children in Sunday School. One of them is an eight-year-old boy who, for the last four weeks, has found things to pout and whine about. Now I’ve been teaching him since he was about three or four and I love him like my own grandson. But I refuse to tolerate his attitude. If I let him he’ll take up all the class time with his attitude. Two weeks ago he spent most of the class time sitting in the corner with his face to the wall. He didn’t get to participate in the singing and games we were having because of his attitude. I hugged him after class and reminded him that I loved him. I talked to him about his actions and had him think about the consequences of his attitude. I want him to understand that he is responsible for his attitude. Nobody makes you mad; you choose to be mad.
          Scripture tells us in Ephesians 4:23 “And be renewed in the spirit of your mind.” In other words, change the way you think.
          For example, if I am super tired when I go to bed, I snore. My snoring used to bother my husband and it would cause him to lose sleep. One night when it disturbed him the thought came to him that if I was snoring it meant I was getting a good night’s sleep. Now it doesn’t bother him anymore.
          Romans 12:2 says “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Don’t let the world tell you how you should think or what your attitudes should be. Allow the Word of God to help you change the way you think. It has helped many people over the years, including my husband and myself. So give it a try. What have you got to lose?

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The Competitive Spirit

by Aleta Kay

          When Tom and I first met I was very insecure and felt that I was inferior to almost everyone. He was (and still is after 40 years of marriage) good looking, quiet, reflective, confident but not cocky. He was sure of himself. He needed to be needed and I needed someone who would love me the way I was (a mess).
          All of that was great at first, but after a while the person who needs to be needed begins to feel drained because the other person, by nature, is self-centered and still needy. This is when the problems begin.
          I’ve always been good at English and grammar and terrible at just about everything else. Tom is good at math, logic, science, putting things together, finding out how things work. But he’s terrible at spelling, English, grammar, and related subjects. We complement each other very well. He handles the finances (I can balance the checkbook, but anything more complicated than that is his territory) and I do the spelling if he needs help, and the letter writing.
          I used to feel so inferior to him and his whole family. I would compare my weaknesses with his strengths and constantly put myself down. This would often lead to arguing, not because he felt superior, but because it hurt him to see me do this to myself and know there was nothing he could do about it.
          Marriage is not a competition to see who is smarter, better, faster, more gifted or talented. It is about blending the weaknesses and strengths of each other in order to be fitly joined together in harmony.
If you are one of those women that puts your husband down because you feel inadequate or inferior, think about what you’re doing to him. Love does tear down (including yourself); it builds up. Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. This is primarily to teach us how to exhibit love to others, but can also be applied to ourselves. We are not to love ourselves to the point that we think we are better, smarter, prettier, etc., but we are to love ourselves enough to be able to think of others first, to be able to give love to those who don’t know how to love themselves.
          Permanent change can only come from God the Holy Spirit, as He comes to live in your heart after you have asked Jesus to save you from your sins and make you more like Him. Since Jesus taught me to accept the strengths He has given me, and to recognize that my weaknesses are there so I may be fit for someone else whose strengths and weaknesses are opposite mine, we have a peaceful home and a fabulous relationship with each other and with our God. Try it; you’ll like it.

Monday, March 19, 2012

So You’re Considering Divorce

by Aleta Kay


          When you were dating he paid attention to you. You went out on dates, had fun together. Now he seems to work all the time. When he’s home he’s either glued to the TV, asleep in his chair, or working on something he brought home. What happened to that great guy that used to talk to you for hours about everything? This is not what you signed up for.
          Maybe that’s not the problem. Maybe you think he’s cheating on you, or maybe you know he’s cheating on you.
          Maybe the problem is finances. Most marriages end over financial problems. You think money should be handled one way; he thinks another. Maybe one of you is addicted to spending, or just don’t know how to save.
          Whatever the problem that is making you consider divorce, think about this: every time you give up it’s easier to give up the next time around. Second marriages, and subsequent marriages after that (or other relationships if you skip the marriage step) generally last shorter and shorter lengths of time. If you truly want to be happy, try marriage counseling first, preferable with a Bible-believing pastor. Why? Because counselors who don’t know the Lord will take sides and tell one of you that you have a right to feel the way you do. Generally speaking, they will deepen the chasm between you and your husband. Someone who truly believes the Bible will try to help you find solutions that will work for you so the two of you can be happy together again.
          It isn’t always possible, but most marriages can be saved if given half a chance. Search Bible counselors online if you aren’t sure who to call.  Call a local church and talk to the pastor. Ask how much counseling HE has done (the Bible says women are not to be pastors so if it’s a woman she’s already disobeying God and doing what the Bible says, regardless of her reasons for being in her position). Ask what sources he uses for counseling. If he uses other books, and doesn’t use the Bible, find another counselor. Also call Joyce Meyer ministries. She calls herself a pastor or minister, but is in fact, a Bible teacher; although many men attend her seminars, most of her teaching is geared toward women. Her pastor got her ministry going and her husband is head of her ministry so I don’t have a problem with her. Her ministry started, and has stayed under the authority of men that God has put over her.
          Her ministry can be contacted at: Joyce Meyer Ministries – U.S. Headquarters
P.O. Box 655
Fenton, MO 63026
Phone: 1-800-727-9673
(636) 349-0303 (outside the U.S.)

You can also contact Michael and Debi Pearl at www.NoGreaterJoy.org. They are both excellent counselors. Michael counsels men; Debi counsels women.

Give your marriage every chance you can before you give up. The other side of the problem is worth all the effort. I know first hand. God bless.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Life Lessons

by Aleta Kay

         Unless you're a hermit, you have relationships. Sometimes it seems family relationships are the hardest. That's because we have far stronger emotional ties to family. The stronger the emotional ties the greater possibility of hurt feelings and misunderstandings.
         When I first married my husband I was young, insecure, and had a chip on each shoulder. I didn't feel that my mother loved me so I tried to become my mother-in-law's daughter. Of course it didn't work. My relationship with my mother-in-law was off to a very rocky start. How could it be otherwise? I was pregnant, moody, and afraid to clean house for fear of criticism as my mother had done. There was a lot of misunderstanding back in those days and I was afraid to talk about my feelings. Consequently I was left out of a lot of things, or at least felt that I was, and I felt like just an appendage to the family. (Things are much better now.)
        Sometimes a death in the family causes squabbles among those left behind. This seems to be especially likely when one person has been a caretaker of the deceased or, because one person lives in closer proximity to parents than their siblings they seem, to the others, to be getting preferential treatment. This can cause jealousy and hard feelings.
        The Bible tells us to live peacably with all men (meaning mankind). It also tells us to forgive others as we want to be forgiven. If you feel like just an appendage to the family, try to see things from someone else's perspective. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Is there something in you that turns them off? Are you always on the defensive? Do you get offended easily? I used to. Look at the situation and look for possible reasons why things happened or were done as they were. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Psalms 119:165--"Great peace have they which love thy law, and nothing shall offend them." If we love God's law then we have to trust that God allows things into our lives to help us grow so we should not be offended. Ask what you can learn from the situation. Be the first to attempt to make amends.Choose not to be offended. Choose to get past hurt feelings. Choose to be a great person to be around. Be contagiously happy.

Monday, March 12, 2012

My Novel, "Mending Fences" (an excerpt)

Mending Fences
by Aleta Kay

           April heard the sound of a child screaming and the soul-wrenching sob of "Dear, God, No!" escaped her lips at the same moment the brakes squealed and crunched metal. The glass April had been washing crashed to the floor. Please, God, don't let it be Cassie. Please, God, don't let it be Cassie. Her heart seemed to pound in rhythm to her heart's cry. She would always remember the ticking clock seeming so loud and slow while her heart was trying to pound its way out of her chest. Her eyes noted the time as she rushed out the door, unaware of the dishrag she still held. The clock showed six-twenty-three. They just finished supper, all except Robert, who was away--again.
          Terror washed over her soul in waves; her feet felt like they were slogging through water while her mind was screaming and praying for her child to be alright, knowing at the same time that nothing would ever be alright again.
          The driver of the car standing by the crumpled bicycle wrung his hands and wept. "I'm so sorry." He tentatively reached out a hand toward April to comfort her. "I didn't see...I mean, she came...it happened so fast." He gulped and reached for April's arm a second time.
          April didn't seem to notice him at first. Then her eyes seemed to clear for just a moment as she looked at the man and screeched, "Don't you touch me! Look what you've done. Cassie, please be alright, sweetheart. Please be okay. Mommy's here. A wail escaped from deep in her throat as she stroked the child's bloody hair.


This book is available in Kindle or e-book form from Amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. But be sure to find it under author name because there is another e-book with the same title but it has a different cover. My cover is a drawing of a man with a baseball style hat standing in a field with a little tombstone and a brick wall and various other types of fencing.



No Fishing!

by Aleta Kay

         This post may be similar to yesterday’s but is a slightly different angle. Guilt can damage or poison our relationships with others. It may cause you to push others away because you feel unworthy. There is hope. Read on.
Does guilt plague you? Does it wake you up at night and point its bony finger in your face? Do you beat yourself up, tell yourself how worthless and stupid you are? If so, this post is for you.
          First of all, yes, you are a sinner. Yes, you have made mistakes. There is only one person who ever lived who never made a mistake. His name is Jesus. Let me tell you about the wonderful forgiveness, love, joy, and peace that are available to you through the grace and mercy of the most Wonderful God-human who ever lived. (He’s also the only God-human who ever lived.)
          Jesus loves YOU so much that He took your punishment on the cross. He paid your sin debt because HE LOVES YOU. You can’t stop His love. You can’t undo His sacrifice. If you had been the only person in the world, He still would have gone to the cross for you. But He didn’t stay on the cross. He rose again. He beat death.
          But the only way for you to forgive yourself is to believe and accept His sacrifice as a substitute for your punishment. Then repent (tell God you’re sorry for your sins and ask Him to help you change the direction of your life) and ask God to forgive you and come into your heart and be your Lord and Savior.
          When you do that with a sincere heart (He knows if you are serious or not) the Bible says in Psalms 103:12, “As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.” In other words, He drops them in the bottom of the sea and puts up a “No Fishing” sign. If you go back to Him later and say, “Lord, about that thing I did last night, or last year, or whenever it was,” God will say, “What are you talking about? I don’t remember that.” When He forgives us He deliberately forgets our sins. Now, you need to keep account of yourself, and every time you catch yourself sinning you need to ask God to forgive you and try not to repeat that behavior or attitude. It is a growth process and God is very patient with us as we study His Word and grow in our knowledge of Him and His precepts.
          So, once you have asked Jesus to be your Lord and Savior, when the devil comes knocking with the guilty sign, point him to Romans 8:1—“There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
          You are now on your way to a richer, fuller, happier life in Christ. God bless.
         


Friday, March 9, 2012

Let Go of the Past

by Aleta Kay

         Most of the people I know tend to get into arguments and sling every slight, sin, indiscretion, or stupid or inconvenient thing the other person has done back in their face. Yet, when the other person does the same to the first person, the first gets very irate. Why is that? Why do we expect others to treat us better than we treat them? Why do we expect to be given a pass on our past while feeling the freedom, even right, to cram the past into their faces like last  week’s garbage?
          Many other people just live in the past. My mother used to brood for days over the hurts and slights inflicted on her during her childhood. She would make life miserable for the rest of us for sometimes two or three days.  It controlled her life.
          We all have places in our lives that seem to control us and we have no idea how to gain control over them. We give ourselves excuses or we beat ourselves up for our failures.  We blame others, society, the way we were raised.  We keep ourselves in our own self-made prisons.
          Is there any hope? Is there a remedy? How do we stop the madness?
          First of all, you must recognize that all of these problems are actually sins. Anger is sin. Bitterness, dejection, hatred, self-abasement (negative pride), pride, dredging in the past and slinging all over anyone, but especially those we’re supposed to love, are all sin.
          Secondly, the remedy for sin is the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the only prophet who ever lived who is also God incarnate. He is the only one who ever took our punishment for sin (John 3:16), was crucified, buried and rose again that He might give us eternal life (Romans 6:23).
          What are we to do with this knowledge? Believe that He is God; believe that He took our punishment, died in our place, rose again, and will come again to take us to live with Him some day.
          When we believe these things we must talk to Jesus. Tell Him we are sorry for our sins. Ask Him to forgive you. Ask Him to take away your anger, pain, bitterness, rage, etc. Give them all to Jesus (Matthew 11:29).  John 8:32 says, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”  Jesus said in John 14:6, “…I am the way, and the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” Jesus is the truth. He is the only way to get to God. He is the life that transcends all of our problems and sins.
          Once we have accepted these things and have asked Jesus to live His life through us, to be our Lord and Savior, we need to do what the apostle Paul said in Philippians 3:13, 14: “…forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
          You may be able to affect change by yourself for a while, but without the power of the Holy Spirit, God’s counselor and helper living inside you when you ask Jesus to save you, it won’t last. Psychiatrists and psychologists are expensive and rarely work. Jesus doesn’t cost us anything and He works a lot faster than all of those other “counselors.” Let me know how you’re doing. I care. E-mail me at themarriagementor@yahoo.com. Just put “blog” in the subject line. You don’t have to sign it and I won’t contact you back unless you request it.                                                                                                                                                                                   

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

What Do You Believe?

by Aleta Kay

         You have anger issues. You feel worthless. You feel like the most unlovable person in the world. Maybe your problem is pride. Maybe you think you’re so good you don’t need God. Or maybe you’ve been so abused you always end up in unhealthy relationships. You tell yourself you can’t help it. This is just the way you are.
          Let me share something of my history with you so will know that I do understand emotional pain. My grandfather, from what my mother used to tell me, was a mean man. My mother had a horrible temper and would sometimes go on a three-day rampage. My mother didn’t know anything about discipline. She used punishment. Discipline trains a child by explaining why a spanking is coming or why a privilege is being taken away.  Punishment is the result of out-of-control anger. Mom’s having a bad day and you get the backlash. Most of the spankings I got were deserved, but most of them were also done in anger and were more harsh than necessary. My mother rarely told me she loved me and at the age of nine I was convinced my mother hated me. I told myself that the times she was nice were out of guilt. I know now that none of that is true and I’m thankful I was able to have a good relationship with her before she died.
          We give ourselves messages about ourselves and our value or worth based on our circumstances and those messages. We are what we believe because we don’t know any better. All of that negativity becomes kind of like a security blanket. It’s our comfort zone and we are terrified of change so we say, “Well, that’s just the way I am. I can’t help it.”
          You are right. On your own, you can’t help it. But I have WONDERFUL news! Change is possible because God is all powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere present. You didn’t want to be the kind of parent you were raised with but you have so much rage inside. Maybe you use drugs or alcohol to escape the pain and you end up neglecting your child(ren). You don’t mean to but you can’t help it. You just don’t know what to do or who to turn to.
Look around you. The happiest people I know are people who live for the Lord and the opportunity to serve Him.
          The Bible tells us that we are all sinners, and although we learn many of our behaviors and attitudes from our parents and others, the truth is we choose our actions, attitudes, beliefs and messages we give ourselves. The consequences are ours because the choices are ours. We are the way we are because we are sinners. Every single person alive, regardless of age, race, religion, job status or political status, is a sinner. There is not one person who has ever deserved to go to heaven or ever will deserve it.
          We cannot earn our way into God’s grace. “For by the works of the flesh shall no man be saved.” “For we are saved by grace, and not by the works of the flesh, lest any man should boast.” These are verses out of the Bible, God’s holy word. If anyone could be good enough on their own then Jesus died a cruel death on the cross for nothing. Because Jesus is God (see John 1:1-14) and never had any sin, He is the only way we can get to heaven. Not because we are good enough, but because we BELIEVE on His name and His sacrifice. He shed His blood for our sins. He took our penalty.
          Some people say that’s too easy. There must be more to it than that. People say that because they want to earn it. We feel guilty if we accept a gift without giving anything in return. But we do. We give ourselves, and that is all God wants.
          GOD    LOVES    YOU!!!   HE WANTS TO SAVE YOU FROM YOUR SIN, FROM YOURSELF. HE WANTS TO LOVINGLY TAKE YOU OUT OF SATAN’S GRASP AND PLACE YOU IN HIS LOVING HANDS WHERE YOU WILL BE SEALED UNTO THE DAY OF REDEMPTION. THAT’S THE DAY JESUS WILL COME BACK TO TAKE US, HIS CHILDREN, THOSE THAT BELIEVE ON HIS NAME, OUT OF THIS WORLD. The Bible tells us we must believe that Jesus is God the Son, that He died on the cross for our sins, and that He arose again, out of the grave. We must tell God we are sorry for our sins (and mean it). We must be willing to turn away from our sins and let God help us become the people He wants us to be.
He can help you. He wants to help you. The change isn’t easy. You will not instantly become perfect and have no more struggles. But you will have God’s Holy Spirit living inside you to help you. Find a good church that uses the King James Bible, (the only one that hasn’t been manipulated by man to please ourselves) and get involved in Sunday school where you will learn how to study your Bible and grow in the Lord. You will meet other people who have been where you are now. They won’t be perfect and you may get your feelings hurt sometimes but just remember they aren’t perfect either, and they also have to grow in the Lord (no matter how long they’ve been a Christian).
Finally, if you’re one of those people who says you don’t want to be saved if it’s open to pedophiles, prostitutes, murderers, drunks, and drug-pushers, you do have a choice. You can either go to hell with the ones who don’t get saved, or you can get saved and go to heaven with the ones that do get saved. After all, you’re not perfect either and God loves you.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Why Should A Wife Be Submissive To Her Husband?

by Aleta Kay

          Before I get into the article I just want to apologize for being so lax in my postings lately. I’ve just been really tired, so for all of you who are prayer warriors, please keep me in your prayers.
             
          I’ve heard women say that God must hate women because He says they have to be submissive to their husbands. I’ve heard other women say that this is no longer valid for today’s society. Both thoughts are wrong. Here is why:
          In the garden of Eden Satan came to Eve (he didn’t go to Adam) and seduced her into disobeying God. God had told Adam and Eve that they could eat the fruit of any tree they wished—except for the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Adam and Eve wanted to obey God. They had a close relationship with Him and they wanted to keep it that way. But that old snake in the grass (he really wasn’t a snake yet) told Eve that God wasn’t being truthful with her. He told her that the fruit of that tree would make her as wise as God. In fact she would be like God (scientology: you can be your own god, make your own rules, heal yourself, etc.) Don’t we all want to be intelligent and wise? So Eve ate the fruit and “her eyes were opened” and she now knew right from wrong; good from evil. Life had been perfect and there had been no wrong before then. Everything had been right. Everything had been good.
          God, in His great love and mercy, told Eve (and subsequently all women as recorded in Ephesians chapter 5 and other places) that she would have to submit to her husband. This is real freedom, ladies! Because God holds your husband accountable for your actions because he is supposed to be able to rule his household (and NOT with a heavy hand or an iron fist).  If you love your husband you must be careful to obey him, care for him, make home his place of refuge (even if you have an outside job). You must behave in a manner that will not get him in trouble with God.
          If your husband is not saved (born again by asking God’s forgiveness for his sin, asking Jesus to be his Lord and Savior, and trying through the power of the Holy Spirit to turn his life around) you still must be submissive with much prayer and seeking God’s will on your part that you may not enter into your husband’s sin. You must live an exemplary example before him and pray earnestly that God will save his soul.
          I have met a few women who go to church, profess Christianity, and refuse to do anything for their husbands. They use church and their “religion” as an excuse to berate him and exalt themselves above him. It is not my place to judge, but the word of God clearly teaches that if you treat others with contempt “the love of God is not in you, for how can you love God and hate your brother?” How we treat EVERYONE is very important.
          “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ’s sake, has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:32