by Aleta Kay
This is not going to be an easy column to write. We live in a self-centered society. The commercials tell us that we “are worth it,” that we deserve to be happy, deserve the best of everything. We are told to “grab all the gusto you can get.” Nonsense. The Bible says all we deserve is hell. Anything more than that is a bonus. We are all sinners, every last one of us. It’s just that some of us have accepted God’s mercy shown in the death of Jesus on the cross. We are still sinners, doing our best to live a life pleasing to God. Romans 3:23 says, “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” The death talked about here is eternity away from God, spent in eternal torment in hell.
Does God want us to be happy? Perhaps, but not necessarily. Mostly God wants you to sacrifice your own selfish desires to be an example of His love and grace, even in the face of anger, bitterness, disappointment and heartache. Marriage is intended for a lifetime (Matthew 19:6) Marriage is a solemn commitment, not to be entered into out of obligation or even unbridled passion. Passion will fade with the years and day to day struggles, but commitment is for life.
Children learn what they live. They will follow your example and will mimic your attitudes. If you handle disappointment, heartache, anger, bitterness, etc. in your marriage with an attitude of love, grace, and faith, your children will see you as a strong person. This is especially true if they see this as you pray and ask God for the strength you need to deal with each situation. They will learn to depend on God too. If you weep over your marriage and beg God to strengthen it and to help you be the help meet you were intended to be (no matter how rotten your husband may be), your children will see your compassion and love. You may have to pray for years, but God is faithful. He will help you and carry you through. You will be precious in the site of God and your eternal reward will be great. This life is temporary, after all.